. . . for those of you in London. My thoughts and good wishes go out to the families and friends of those affected by the horrible events of today. And for those in Edinburgh, even though it is considered a 'copycat'.

The events are shattering and it is completely unimaginable. Yes, I live outside DC. Yes, that's the nation's capital of the United States. Yes, 9/11 was horrible. But I only really had to watch it on the news. Aside from some brief, frantic panic about my father who works in DC, it did not touch me personally. The two family members I have in New York did not work in the Towers.

So I can only imagine. And it's hard. I try - but it's hard.

So you have my sympathy. I'd offer empathy - but that I cannot give. And, if the elements are watching, I won't have to. Let's send up a prayer for that. That no one else will have to give empathy.

Mil - I'm glad you are okay.

Posted by: Pandora - 07.07.2005 - 8:08pm - Permalink - Comments (1)
Posted in: News

So - I’m a bit late on my muttering.  SOOOOOOOO?  q:

1. Statistics :: I hate them
2. Grin :: “XD” (turn your head sideways)
3. Saturn :: Rings
4. Fulfilled :: Love
5. Life plan :: Family
6. Cult :: Classic
7. Lily :: RIP
8. Stalemate :: No one can win
9. Celebration :: I actually get a date
10. Underwear :: Lace

Posted by: Pandora - 07.07.2005 - 1:07pm - Permalink - Comments (0)
Posted in: Meme Me

How weird is it that Jen has an entry up that speaks to me at this very moment? I already left her a comment about the interesting timing of both of our entries. Very interesting.

But she's right. I'm only last if I let myself be last.

So - here's a note.

I'm going to be first, dammit. Or you can kiss my ass!

Well. Maybe not first, but I'm not going to be last anymore. That's for darn tootin'!

Posted by: Pandora - 07.06.2005 - 12:07am - Permalink - Comments (2)
Posted in: General

So - you think you've managed to get over it, but - no. It remains. Or - returns. Or comes anew.
A dark pain that slices into your soul - one you thought you could deal with.

But apparently not.

Finding that you are being put off, ignored, left til last is never a good feeling. And I find that I wish that just once - I could come first. For something besides my mom and dad. I know I come first for them. I'm their kid. Of course I do. But can't I be first for someone else? Can't I be the one who gets to hear all the stories? Get all the messages, the emails, the phone calls?

I suppose it's in the stars that I am just the one who gets to be the one turned to when all else fails. The one to be cried on, to comfort. But never to be loved.

I've known this was my place for years.

Why does it still hurt?

Posted by: Pandora - 07.05.2005 - 11:07pm - Permalink - Comments (1)
Posted in: Thoughts

Take it. You know you want to.
(It was seriously fun. (= )

Posted by: Pandora - 06.30.2005 - 8:06pm - Permalink - Comments (1)
Posted in: General